A Bit About The Family

Like every family that got together during the 1970s and "grew up" in the 1980s, my family is a little bit cracked.  We're all crazy about one another, don't get me wrong; in a heartbeat we'd all take a bullet for one another.  But we are aware of our dysfunction, and able for the most part to laugh at it, to the point at which when The Simpsons made their first appearance on the Tracey Ullman Show, my brother and I took to calling one another "Bart" and "Lisa" (despite the reversal of ages). 

The other night, I called home, because I hadn't heard from the parentals all day.  Which is unusual for them.

Dad: [picks up] Hello?
Me: Hi, how are you?
Dad: Is everything all right?
Me: ...yeah, everything's fine.  Is everything all right with you?
Dad: Can we call you back?
Me: ...sure.
Dad: 'Bye. [hangs up]

Two hours later, my phone rang, and I answered.

Mom: Hi, how are you?
Me: I'm fine.  What's up?
Mom: Nothing.
Me: What was going on when I called earlier?
Mom: Oh, we were having [neighbours] over for dinner.
Me: ...Dad sounds very suspicious when he's trying to get me off the phone.  I was wondering if maybe he was in the middle of murdering you, and was having trouble with the fileting.
Mom: [hysterical laughter]

She then put me on speakerphone and demanded that I repeat all that for my dad's benefit.  Upon which he hollered "JACKASS!" at me over the speaker.

It's not an important conversation, but it really illustrates the kind of relationship I have with my parents.  We can say stuff like that about one another to one another, and no one's really offended.  We have a terrific sense of humour, though as dads do tend to do, my own thinks he's funnier than he is.

Me and my dad and my new Oscar. Dad's pretending to want Oscar. I was maybe six or seven years old. I love this picture of the two of us.